Relationships can consume us… I remember a line from the film Thomas Crown Affair (The chess game in the original Steve McQueen one, wow!) In the remake, the man asks the woman something like: it’s clear you like men, why aren’t you with one ? And Rene Russo answers “Men make women messy.” That line so resonated with me and was my truth for so many years.
In this blog, I’d like to invite 3 powerful ideas that we can take into relationships to help transform them into miracle territory, not just for us, but for the world as well.
Whatever is missing in any relationship is what we are not giving
In every part of our life, we go in with the attitude input/output. Our Success in work, with our health, or in friendships is the direct result of the energy we put into those. And yet, with relationships, we can be in let’s see how I feel mode… I witnessed this first hand many years ago with a friend who was involved in a five year relationship with an amazing woman. He would tell her over and over again that he wasn’t sure she was the one. By the time he had decided she was the one, she was So out of there !
In the spirit of JFK’s message, entering a relationship with that attitude, we’ll be in for a way more satisfying experience.
The most certain way to fall in Love with someone is to know them. Vulnerability can be so endearing. But fear gets in the way and we hold back from sharing that. I know that those who have Loved me the most in this lifetime are the ones who’ve known me, up close and personal.
Relationships = communication. Share your truth. Fearlessly.
People will be to you what you are to them
Whatever we want someone else to be more of, it’s on us. You want your partner to be more exciting, you be more exciting. You want your partner to be more romantic, you be more romantic. Nothing less sexy than telling someone how to be. That’s the surest way of sounding like their mother (or father!) and just killing off the attraction.
Even as a parent, modelling behaviour speaks way louder than words.
When we make the relationship the be all and end all of our happiness, we place so much pressure on the other. Who wants to feel that kind of heaviness. When we release people to be who they are, as we pursue what lights us up, we get to be two whole people sharing a fascinating Life together.
All bizarre behaviour is essentially a call for Love
When people tell me what’s going wrong, I ask them if they’re sharing this with their partner. The answer is always No. And yet, who can help solve the issue with them better than the actual person contributing to the problem in the first place.
Relationships = communication. As soon as that line of communication begins, their relationship gets a whole new footing. This alone can quite literally save a relationship. Make authentic communication a big part of your relationship goals.
It’s Amazing how easy it is for us to find people who agree with us about what the other person is doing wrong. I feel the work is totally on us. No one is doing anything to us. If they’re triggering us, then old wounds have been tapped into. And that’s so valuable. It’s the whole point of the relationship – to grow you as a person.
When you notice your stuff coming up in relationships – whatever it is, be it controlling behaviour, judgement of them, criticism of yourself, a need to please etc – take a deep breath in, let go all agenda and remind yourself that relationship goals are for the Highest good of all. And release.
Relationships are assignments. Every single person we meet is important in terms of our own evolution. When we show up as the best us, people either match us or are removed with grace, so we can be with who feels more aligned to us 🌟
If Relationship goals are on your mind, you’ll Love my book Tap into Miracles, A Reminder ❤️
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